Follicle release in the wrong places

This really doesn't fit the label of Confessions of a Gym Dweeb per se. This particular experience doesn't happen at the gym but rather at home.

For the past couple of years, my hairstylist has found that I'm slowly starting to show a thinning crown in the form of a horseshoe. This is serious; especially since I am only 38 years old. I can't accept the concept of me growing old.

To resolve my hair loss, I decided to purchase the Framesi follicle release shampoo my hairstylist was selling. She told me a pearl size amount would be plenty and to only apply over the area where I am starting to thin.

"Okay. Pearl size. Apply in area where I am thinning. Got it," I responded to her direction.

"Don't rub it all over your head. My ex did that and his hair in the back of head was becoming bushy."

"Okay. Pearl size. Apply in area where I am thinning. Not everywhere or I will get bushy. Got it." I responded confidently as I said my good-byes and left her salon.

The next morning I applied a pearl size on my palm and lathered it on the crown of my head as she instructed. I pulled my hands from my head and looked at my hands. There were a few strands of hair on my soapy palms as if slowly suffering a painful death.

To add to this dilemma, I didn't know where I should wash off my soapy hands. Typically, if it was my normal shampoo, I rub it on another part of my body (I'll leave it at that). But this was a different situation. I remembered her tell me specifically apply it on the area I was thinning. The last thing I wanted was a much hairy ass.

I turned around, leaned forward and washed my hands with the shower. I did the same with my soapy hair and tried to avoid having the lather wash down any other part of my body.

This has been my bathing life for the past couple of months. I returned to my hairstylist and asked if she saw any progress. Unfortunately, she had no good news to report. She said I still had the same amount of hair. No new follicles.

Well, I guess I'll still be applying the shampoo until I see some results. In the meantime, I'll need to purchase a new set of trimmers to take care of my lower body hair.